When news of Anthony Bourdain’s death by suicide broke in 2018, it was a genuine shock. The question of why Bourdain would take his life puzzled audiences who, for more than two decades, viewed him in high regard, thanks to his ongoing presence on shows like No Reservations and Parts Unknown. These programs elevated the chef-turned-author-turned-TV-host into a bona fide celebrity, using cuisine as a gateway to talk about cultures and communities not often represented in U.S. media. Yet, in the new documentary Roadrunner: A Film About Anthony Bourdain, a picture emerges of a man who, despite living the best of adventures, dealt with personal demons that grew the more he evolved on-camera.

Roadrunner comes courtesy of documentary filmmaker Morgan Neville, who previously worked on the acclaimed 2018 Mister Rogers documentary Won’t You Be My Neighbor? With Fred Rogers, Neville excelled at taking an individual, who millions had grown up watching, and humanizing the man. Neville follows a similar approach here, using archival footage to detail how a New York chef with anti-social tendencies and a fascination for stories incorporated both into his 1999 memoir Kitchen Confidential. This “lawless” book about his love-hate relationship with cooking and addiction catapulted the author to the New York Times Best Seller list and frequent late-night appearances, eventually gaining enough a public face to turn the next book into his first TV show, A Cook’s Tour.

It wasn’t an easy production at first. According to producer Lydia Tenaglia, Bourdain had never really traveled internationally before. But gradually his willingness to incorporate his own verbal wit and various film references gave the show a core idea: experience the culture you visit, rather than simply explain it to people. This laid the foundation for television’s Anthony Bourdain, the worldly figure who consumed unusual foods and saw places that not everyone could experience. It’s a persona that, for better and for worse, evolved as its host began taking a more active role in how episodes were shot and written, becoming at once a good friend and a pain to work with off-camera.

Neville expertly layers this characterization through an amalgamation of behind-the-scene footage, interviews, and home video recordings that emphasize Bourdain’s duality, a man forever willing to hear the world out and overly committed to burying own his personal fears in activities to somewhat toxic degrees.

Roadrunner presents his addictions and doubts as extensions of his voyeuristic motivations. He fell in love three times, and was an old-school romantic who took the fallout of each relationship personally but also tried to become the best partner and father possible. He never wanted to get political on camera, yet he openly embraced humanist narratives that made the world seem more than just a collective of doomsday tales and terrorist attacks. At times he even became the news itself, famously gaining a front row seat to the 2006 Lebanon War while filming an episode of No Reservations.

Bourdain was a man adrift, and you can sense that these experiences in new countries were cathartic to some degree. As the documentary points out, he was an Apocalypse Now fan and, like Captain Kurtz, seemed to prefer the unknown to a world back home where these problems were harder to ignore.

Even when discussing the events leading up to his death, Bourdain’s family and friends remember “Tony” as expressive and funny but also obsessive and aloof, with his last years negatively influencing his relationships with crew members. Yet Neville still paints these trials and tribulations as part of Bourdain’s ongoing conundrum, forever interested in hearing stories about other people despite struggling with his own issues.

Roadrunner is full of highs and lows about Anthony Bourdain’s life, but it never feels sensational or unsympathetic toward his personal issues. The film acknowledges that, in a way, he never stopped being an addict, but he also tried to overcome his addictions, and it was through trying that he developed a unique counterculture voice on the Travel Channel. Those who watch this film might witness Bourdain’s rough edges, but hopefully they’ll come away seeing a man as complicated and “real” as the one we fell in love with on television.

Roadrunner: A Film About Anthony Bourdain will open in theaters on July 16, 2021.